Saturday, October 23, 2010

Chelsea Handler on Sister Wives

Recently watched Chelsea Lately, the eChannel show which stars Chelsea Handler.  She is my kind of comedian...funny, irreverent and sacrastic.   She will tackle any topic or issue, even her own life with her comedy.  This short clip is from a recent show where she shares her thoughts about the new reality show, Sister Wives--which may soon be off the air since the people on it forgot they were living in Utah and breaking the law.  Sister Wives may soon have a whole new meaning for the 4 women if they end up in jail.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Changing the Age We Retire

I understand that France is attempting to increase the retirement age to 62 and there are a lot of French people who are very unhappy about this...mostly young people who planned to retire much younger than 62.

I think the retirement system in the U.S. also needs revising and for the past few years I have been doing powerpoint presentations at drive-thrus and campgrounds in an effort to promote my proposal for change.  This effort has so far resulted in my making America's Most Delusional List--picture included, but I am thoroughly committed to continue this effort.

My proposal is simple...retirement should begin at 40, continue until we are 60 and then you work until you just can't stand it any more.  I think this is a very reasonable idea because in your 40s most people look good in their passport photos, have energy to do things, and are willing to travel, learn new languages and drink microbrews.  It is the best time to enjoy your retirement.

I am not sure the age people can currently retire in France, but I am thinking of proposing my plan to their government because I need to find a new audience.  Au revoir

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Horoscope - Scorpio

I am going to start writing my horoscopes again not because anyone has requested them, but because I have to write something other than long letters to John McCain and Jon Kyle urging them to find another line

So for you astrological types, here is the horoscope for Scorpio.  In case you don't recall dates, Scorpios are October 23 to November 21st.  The sign for Scorpios is that of a Scorpion...not really that clever if you think about it so try not to.

Scorpios are intense little beings who can be nasty if you hurt or cross them.   They are both likable and just the kind of people you report to Block Watch.

If you are a Scorpio just know that you are in for a fun year. Seems that Neptune is aligned with Mercury rising and what that means is beyond me.  However, I do think you will find yourself wanting to spend a lot of time looking at the Dollar Menu at McDonalds thinking there is a message hidden among the menu items.  The message is probably related to your cholesterol levels, but who knows?

Scorpio is a water sign and so after the first of the year you will find yourself unable to resist popping a tent and living near water.  This could mean the ocean, a lake, a stream, or your bathtub--whatever works because if the stars dicate it, you have to it.

Later in the year your 8th house is going up for sale, which means that you are going to have some turmoil in your life.  Can't determine what this is right now--could be a job change, a liposuction procedure, move, relationship change, or a reality show with Wink Martindale, if he is still alive and well.  Be ready for anything.

Remember, Scorpios, Pluto is your key planet, so keep a picture of it in your wallet, on your desk, or better yet, get a tattoo some place where you can share it in public.  Pluto is related to your unconscious mind or maybe being unconscious, I can't remember which.  So, if you are unconscious alot or think you are channeling Sigmund Freud you are in the Scorpio Zone -- yipee for you.

Happy Stars and Planets